Saturday, 30 January 2021

Diary: A Plague on Both Your Houses

I'm not a bleating remoaner, honest. I get that we've left (but I'm not conceding that "will of the people" crap!) and that we're no longer a member of the EU but...

What about those promises, Boris, eh? What about defending our borders, preventing an invasion by all manner of illegals? Eh? Eh? 

Mind you, immigrants are getting ever-more inventive in the manner of their entry into the country. This monster was hiding in a head of brocolli, if you please, and emerged - rather quickly - as I was rinsing it prior to cooking...

I think I doused his wings, too, because after springing forth (and frightening the living daylights out of me) he crouched, inert in the bottom of the sink thus allowing me to trap him under a glass. As he dried out (and warmed up - the broccoli had been in the fridge since Saturday!) he began to get a little more frisky. I was all for releasing him into the garden either to find his own way home or (more likely) to provide some dietary variety for the local fauna, but wiser counsel (wife, son and daughters) prevailed. They were less concerned about the creature's welfare than their own, though - they were terrified it would simply find its way back into the house!

I'm not sure he'd have survived long in the frozen wastes outdoors, though. Because, at last, and much to the delight of at least one daughter, we've had a sprinkling of snow, not enough for a snowman but enough for what I'm reliably informed is a snow puffin:

I wonder if a puffin would eat a locust as a change to fish? 

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