Saturday, 30 January 2016

Saturday girl... episode 2

In the second instalment of our occasional series in the life of a part-time sales assistant, we join the action late one Saturday afternoon in the lingerie section of that well-known High Street retailer beloved of generations of mainly female shoppers...

Cast: customer (mid-late fifties, male, shirt and tie, tweed jacket, with the bucolic gait and ruddy countenance of, perhaps, a farmer; sales assistant (the eponymous Saturday girl).

Customer: I'd like a bra, please.

Saturday girl: Certainly, sir. What size?

Customer: Oh, er... I don't really know.

Saturday girl: Ok, well. Any idea what type?

Customer: What type?

Saturday girl: What type of bra?

Customer: Well, one to hold a pair o' boobs o' course (he laughs).

Saturday girl: Ah, ok sir. So, er... how big are they?

Customer: Well how should I know? How big do you think they are?

Saturday girl: Who is the bra for, sir?

Customer: For?

Saturday girl: Yes, perhaps it would be better for the person to come to the store themselves? We can measure them. We have a specialist bra-fitting service and...

Customer: What d'you mean? I'm not sure I want anyone fiddling around wi' a tape measure underneath me shirt. Besides, I'm ticklish.

Saturday girl: Well yes, of course, sir, but...

(A penny drops, from a great height and making quite a din, like a gong in the monastic silence of a cathedral-size acoustic.)

Saturday girl: (quietly) Who did you say the bra was for, sir?

Customer: Why - me o' course.

Exeunt, pursued by a bra.



Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...