Friday, 25 November 2011

Diet? What Diet?

Forgive me Claire (she's my Tesco Diets nutritionist) for I have sinned. I have erred and strayed from the ways of my special healthy type-2 diabetes reducing menu like a lost sheep. I have followed too much the devices and desires of my own stomach. I have offended against thy dietary laws and have left uneaten those things that I ought to have eat(en) and eaten those things which I ought not to have eat(en). And there is (probably) no health (or not as much as there should be) in me.

If you're not familiar with Thomas Cranmer's magisterial prayer book prose you'll probably wonder what on earth I'm on about. So I'll tell you. I'm on a diet. For three weeks I've been asked to stick to a special 'healthy' meal-planner provided by Tesco Diets as part of their £s for lbs campaign. And I've enjoyed it. As I said at the outset, having meals planned, new and exciting menus provided and (if you want it, and I do) a direct link to Tesco Online who then deliver all the ingredients to my door has been nothing short of jolly exciting. And some of the meals have been stupendous. Look at this, for example:


But...

But...

Oh dear.

It was the pork scratchings that did it. We were out last night watching Santa switch on the Christmas lights and, well, the walk with Sally to collect some piano music afterwards was long and, well, the shop was inviting and, well you know the rest... Although, on my return, I did cook a very tasty fruity chicken curry as recommended (and from scratch, I might add) I then fell spectacularly off the wagon by washing it down with several bottles of Henry Weston's Vintage Special Reserve er, apple juice. You know the sort.

And I was doing so well...

And enjoying it, too.

(Ok, I haven't yet made the chickpea stew from week one but it doesn't matter - if you don't fancy a particular meal there are endless alternatives.)

So, it's back to the austerity diet today for me. I say 'austerity' but it isn't that really. In fact, it's almost anything but. No, 'tasty' would be a better adjective.

Just not quite as tasty as those pork scratchings.

Oh, the temptations of forbidden fruit. I know I'm not the first. And I probably won't be the last. And just look what it did for Eve...


Does my bum look big in this?
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